Rediscovering Your Why After having a baby
Let’s be real, Mama: the nonstop pressures of motherhood do not afford much time to nurture passions or relationships, let alone develop a strong sense of self. In fact, a quick Google search of “losing yourself after having a baby” yields about 217,000,000 results! This begs the question: why do so many women feel as though they are no longer “themselves” after becoming parents? And more, what can we do about it?
In our culture, mothers are told that anything we do for ourselves takes something away from our children. There’s this deep, unwritten sense that if we do something that is solely to fill our own cups, it inherently makes us “less than”. (Spoiler alert: it’s not true.)
Outside of motherhood, our sense of identity comes from the choices we make about things like relationships, careers, hobbies, friendships, and lifestyle. These choices often reflect who we are and what we value in life. Once you become a parent, these choices often change–your life is no longer just yours, it’s entangled with this tiny human (or humans) who are (rightfully so) the center of your universe. But why should you have to choose between finding a life outside of motherhood and being an amazing parent?
The answer is, you shouldn’t. It’s normal to want the absolute best for your family, but it’s also completely and totally natural to want a purpose and a passion outside of motherhood. You can be a mom and a friend, a mom and a nurse, a mom and a business owner. There is no perfect path to reclaiming your sense of self, Mama, but finding your “why” is possible. If you’re feeling anxious, overwhelmed, and exhausted, it’s time to find yourself again.